You can break my cable (I broke the cable) but you will never break my spirit! (Again, it was me who broke the cable)
I broke my fancy stepper. (Again.) Not broke broke. I sheered off a(nother) bolt. And the last time I did it, when I reassembled it, the nut was too tight so when it broke this time, the cable broke too.
So it was 5 am on a Wednesday and 3 minutes into my workout, the steps collapsed and I was just standing there.
What happened next probably only happened because I have my eating under control. Because I was calm and unruffled and entirely unbothered about the situation, which is the direct result of 18+ years of experience that it’s all gonna work out for the best as long as I don’t get high on sugar.
I went online on my phone to order a new cable. Less than $35. My husband told me to get 2, because it was worth it to have a spare. (Have I mentioned I have broken several steppers, and sheered off several bolts of my fancy stepper? Anyway…) And we agreed I should buy another cheap stepper while we waited for my replacement part.
But my order for the parts wouldn’t go through. I wrote to customer service. I ordered a new cheap stepper to be delivered. And then eventually I had the idea to order my replacement parts on my desktop. That went through!
So I got my cheap replacement stepper that morning. Did my workout and then got an email from the company selling the replacement parts for my fancy stepper. They were giving me an (unrequested) refund. They were giving me a refund for partial shipping and only charging me for one cable. The lady from customer service wrote back to me to say that the broken one was covered under warranty.
For everything that went “wrong” NOTHING actually went wrong!
I think so much of it is how I look at the world while I have my eating under control. I am always trying to be looking for the gifts. I am always trying to be looking for the lesson. I am always trying to be looking for the ways it can go right.
I am not always good at it! But I can actually DO it because when I got my eating under control, I could start to hear my real thoughts, feel my real feelings, get to know the real me. And then I could be the real me. And there is so much freedom in that.
I guess what I am trying to say is that the more I like myself, the less I need to control the world around me. And the more authentic I am, the more I like myself.
People think my rules about eating are restrictive. And they are. But there’s a thing that comes with rules and following rules. A lack of guilt. So I am not ashamed of my eating (or my inability to stop eating) and I like myself and I love my body and treat it with love, respect and kindness.
When you are that secure, there is no need to worry about a little thing like a broken cable. And when you don’t have to worry, you can stay out of the way and let Life do its thing.
onceafatgirl 